Thursday, June 2, 2011

Is it over yet?

It's been a really rough month. In the middle of working my ass off on my marriage (Gary is too) and making sure my friends are ok I've lost track of ME. I saw my shrink today and I had to tell him for the first time in a while that I'm NOT ok. My moods are a complete mess. I can go from bitchy to crying to happy in a matter of 15 minutes. I'm responding to situations in a fashion I wouldn't normally respond. (Crying about things that aren't sad, mad about things that wouldn't normally make me mad). My bipolar feels out of control. I told Gary last night that I feel like a stretched out rubberband, just waiting to snap. All that being said, Dr. Bisla went through my meds and he said that I've been on the same doses for about 3 years now and maybe between that and the fact that my life IS complicated right now I could use a few changes. He upped my Lamictal by 100mg. He said that SHOULD do the trick. I really hope it does. Having a little more control over my emotions would be great. But, it's kinda why I've been avoiding phone calls and visiting people because I never know what's going to set me off and I don't want to take it out on any one that I really care for. It's also why I really haven't posted.

Over all though, it has been a good week or two. Busy weeks but the weekends are nice.
Saturday (the 28th) I picked up Melia and Riley and we headed over to Sandra's house so that Melia could take her family pictures. (I sneaked a peek and they are awesome!) Sandra has such a gorgeous family and Melia is a fantastic photographer.
Also, I've known Melia about 8 years and Sandra for about 4 years and I have NO pictures (good ones anyway) of me and Melia or me and Sandra so I got my wish AND they turned out really great!!! I can't wait to print them out and use the new frame I got with these pictures in mind.
After the pictures we went and grabbed Gary from home. Gary, Melia, Riley and I went out to get ice cream from ColdStone and then headed back to their side of town to take them home.
Sunday was a day of relaxation and since it was Memorial Day Monday was as well.

This week was hectic. I told Gary today that it's been the LONGEST 4 day work week ever. Every day seems to be dragging by and that has a lot to do with my emotions and how busy I've been.
I have a nice weekend planned though so I'm really looking forward to that.

Enough rambling from me for now (which is a side effect of out of control emotions). I love you guys and if the weekend goes as planned you'll hear all about it on Monday.

(Me and Sandra)

(Me and Melia)

(Melia, Me and Sandra)

1 comment:

  1. Those photos are beautiful! I hope things level out for you soon!